Roxy with Santa

 Accidental Happiness Beginning With Roxy


I have three English bulldogs, Daisy Mae, Winston and Marcus.  Daisy Mae is 3, Winston is 2 years and 8 months, and Marcus is 10 weeks old.  Ironically, it was my ex-husband that got me hooked on bulldogs.  That is the one positive thing that came out of my first failed marriage.


My first bulldog, a female, was given to us by a friend of his who was going through a divorce and in which the husband allegedly mistreated the dog.  The wife was so concerned that she gave the dog away to my ex-husband convinced that he would take better care if the dog.  Well, she was half-right.


When my ex-husband told me we were getting a bulldog I was not thrilled.   I had assumed as others, whom are not familiar with the breed, that this dog would be hard to train and not good around kids, since I was eventually planning on becoming a mother.


When my ex brought the dog home, I immediately fell in love with her.  She was only 6 months old and had such a beautiful face.  She was white and brindle mix and she looked so scared.


I immediately picked her up and loved feeling her body curled up in my arms with her head resting on my chest.


She was named Jarhead by the previous owner, and I assumed the name had something to do with the Ritchie Rich cartoon character. It wasn’t until I met my current husband a couple of years later, who was in the military at the time, that Jarhead is a term for Marines.  Then it dawned on me that my ex did mention that Roxy’s former owner, was in the military.


I disliked that name and thought it was not appropriate for such a pretty dog, so I renamed her Roxy.  Ironically, Roxy was one of the issues my ex ended up having with me, he felt that I was giving too much attention to the dog than to him.  He, like Roxy’s original father, ended up mistreating Roxy, simply because he became jealous over me doting over her so much.  Needless to say, the marriage ended for other reasons, but this gives you a glimpse of what I was dealing with.


He didn’t fight me for ownership of Roxy and I was thrilled to keep her; thus my love for bulldogs began at this time.


I have had many bulldogs over the years, and yes, they are sloppy, expensive to maintain, stubborn, lazy and they can smell.  However, I think the same can be said for husbands. (Just kidding).  They also are prone to health issues to include hip dysplasia, skin and breathing problems.  That aside, I think the positives outweighs the negatives; they are loving and loyal dogs.  They love attention, love to play and most of all they love to cuddle with you.  They are not walking or running dogs and should not be outside in extremely warm temperatures.  Bulldogs are prone to overheat more than other dogs.  They are also extremely kid-friendly; bulldogs love kids and will typically become very protective of children in their family.  They are great companion dogs and crave affection.


I never thought a bulldog would bring me so much joy and happiness. 


I love seeing my dogs cuddle together, play together and be protective of one another.  I love the fact that when I walk in the door they cannot wait to see me and our jumping all over me.  Yes, I have to deal with a lot of slobber and dog hair, but it is worth it for me.  Happiness to me is spending time with my bulldogs.


I always thought I knew what made me happy, however, as I have gotten older, I have learned that you don’t know what happiness is until you experience it.  We do things thinking they make us happy and then we wonder why we still feel miserable.


I do know that when I am with my bulldogs I am calm as well as content.


Happiness is when you feel content and at peace with yourself in the present moment.  Happiness is what makes you truly happy, not what society or someone else says should make you happy.  I thought money, fame and approval from others would bring me ultimate happiness.  Life experience has taught me that those things do not equate to happiness, for me, now.


Don’t get me wrong, there are other things that bring me happiness, spending time with my husband, getting together with my friends, when my special-needs child is having a good day, reading and writing.


However, when everything else is not going so well, my dogs cuddling up to me, fighting for that space on my lap, always brings me pure happiness.



Kim is married and has is the parent of a special-needs child diagnosed with Autism and IDD (Intellectual Developmental Disability). She has a Bachelor’s Degree in English Literature from UMBC. Kim has worked for the Government, both as an employee and contractor, worked as a Communications Director for a non-profit organization and then went on to run her own web development and social media consultation business for five years before relocating to Downingtown, PA. Kim enjoys writing, working out, reading, spending time with her family, which includes her three English Bulldogs and she is a Beatles’ fan. In addition, she is also a member of the Screen Actor’s Guild and has worked in various films and TV shows from 1994 – 2003. She currently is working on her first book; a fictional psychological thriller about one woman’s journey finding out the truth behind a former high school classmate’s suicide.